Monday, March 24, 2008
after camp syndrome.easter camp, that is. lack of sleep, hungry, bored.sleep is the thing i that i need most now..though money is next on the list.
wake up at 3 after sleeping at 12 to stand around and order ppl around is not exactly the thing that i wanna do.esp not if scolding ppl early in then morning is part of the agenda.well.the good thing was mcdonalds breakfast =) sasuage mcmuffin with egg, hashbrown, milo.though the hashbrowns were stuck to the paper.mashbrown would have been a more befitting description though.sians.i just wanna sleep now..
I went off at
6:00 PM
Friday, March 21, 2008
what the fuck man.i mean.if you cant take my jokes, then just take it in your stride la.sigh.seriously sia.if you dont konw that side of me?dont call yourself my parents. if you can be sacarstic to everyone, and when ppl coame back from work, not happy then ram off at every one you can.when other ppl come back from work buay song, then jsut talk, you say why you not happy only everyone must kena from you.talk about hypocritisim.hmmph.0h wells.not saying that i not used to it or anything la.who you think you are? er.lets consider the options shall we?erm.YOUR FREAKING SON?! i saw your hand coming up.if not for the fact that you were my dad, i would have taken you down and broken your arm that very instance. try me.your shout.please la.if i were to shout, ha.everyone would have woke up.i was not parade commander for so many parades for nothing.dun be so sacarstic.sound familiar? and i really wonder who was the one that was being sacarstic.jsut what.1 sentense ago?really man. other than you being my dad?i didnt wanna see you go hospital and we have to pay for the bills.and den and the rest have to go to hospital to visit you.waste travel money.sigh.really man..somehow.thers theis feeling that wants to see him on the floor, pinned down by me,screaming in pain, asking or odering me to let him go.maybe one day.it'll come true.camp tomorro.lagi better.but wasted onli 2 day camp.sigh.oh wells.lucky never tell bs i going late sia.
I went off at
9:25 PM
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
oh wells.going into army in september..i hope. after that, down under is where i'm going.not hell hor.dun anyhowly think. that means no presidents man.no ocs. no more nothing. but ang moh ppl.burger, cheeese and cows. not the frozen ones we see in ntuc. or the market.the life ones that go mooo.yes.those that can kena mad cow disease.yes.sound happy and stuff but nope.not one bit.leaving the place i grew up in.the place i made friends, where i fell in love and broke my heart in the end.the place where i grew up and learnt. but sigh.what to do.parents wanna leave this place for good.but thank God for budget airlines.the 20 odd bucks tix to and from auzzie =) well..
haven really recovered but what to do..life goes on no mater what right? sigh.
camp on sat. AGAIN.sian.but not so bad.got lan =)
I went off at
5:41 PM
Friday, March 14, 2008
sigh.my hearts broken..yet again.but then again.it was never whole to begin with. sigh. i mean.if you wanted to tell me, maybe saying it not so bluntly may help the impact? sigh.i was already expecting a no but hey. who likes it so hard? sigh. it really hurts. doubt i'll go after anyone..sigh.enough le.no more. sigh.
if you read the message?it;ll hurt you super deep.sigh.used to it. it was a chase that i know would lead nowhere.i knew it from the start.i should not have chased since i knew i would not be able to catch.her.sure.i knew this ending but it still hurts.sigh. thanks jie..cus seriously? if not for you..i think i good game le. sigh. masking up again..
*that one sentence killed me.inside and outside*
I went off at
4:37 PM
Wednesday, March 12, 2008
oh wells.never post for super long le. okok.8 march.went midnight supper after lazer tag. the stupid bar chor mee man.take a bloody half hour to deliever a small bowl of noodles. chiong him so many times then he bring. eeevvvvviiiiiillllllll. slept till 2 the next day. hee
oh wells.feeling lazy todae.went to get a job at babw! got it. wl la. kena target by adelina. like seow. heart ritual and stuff. then the stuffing. kena mcflurry. snowed on me sia. not so bad. the worst on is those that kena adeline. they kena tekan super bad.
got this girl looked just like esmeralda! her name ace. not bad.but.somethings are better left not mentioned. not bad.helped each other out. all in all? it was fun..later got aikido.leg super pain.dunno can do not.sigh
out
I went off at
4:33 PM
Saturday, March 08, 2008
oh wells..nothing much happened today..dens at camp..kinda miss her though..not used to the quietness around in the house..ah wells. phones quiet..dunno what happened,.suddenly never reply..not that i'm not used to it..
she has camp tomorro till monday.wont be messaging her in that time..but one thing for sure..i'll be thinking of her.
i;m bored..to the core.nothing to do.wanna sleep but cant sleep. wanna do something but nothing to do..sigh.got the urge to try and call her again but she got camp tomorro and i dun wanna get disappointed again..sigh.
i;m getting emo..dunno why. just wanna shut up and let the world go past.take every step cus its necessary. i just feel like something left me. a HUGE hole in me. is it the ppl i hang out with? is it the things i have experienced? is it my past experiences? was it the things i have done? is it the things i have yet to do?is it the things that have happened? is it the things that i fear? is it the self confidence that i have lost? all these questions add up and i feel like i'm spiralling deeper and deeper into despair. the mask i managed to take off is coming back once again.and i am not exactly happy about that. whats happening? money is a concern for me. parents arnt exactly doing that well. i dun wanna be a burden to them. i just wanna stay out and not add to the cost of their living. i just wanna lighten them of the load. i;m gonna get a better paying job. live off myself. but.who is gonna hire me? poly starting soon. sigh.
i just wanna sit in a corner and just let the world go round and on.quietly.
I went off at
12:51 AM
Friday, March 07, 2008
camp..TA and awards camp..not much happened. but one of the funniest things that a certain person said..huh you have balls?sorry bu i have tentacles! [he meant testicles]. then the drill answers that they gave int he drill theory is RETARDED. haha. then the first night i went to collect the test papers then at teh same time went to buy milo for the primers =D then the last night after the night walk, officers bought us supper.hokkien mee and stuff.
then today..went to have lunch with tim and then went home. at tampines, sai called and told me to meet the guys at city hall at 6. it was 330.i reached home then rest then walk out again. haha. well..didnt regret. kar wei aka rainbow man, went crazy, as usual, towards the end of the outing, sai put his cold hand on him and he went, after 2 seconds lag time. ah!MAT selamat! and we imitated him like crazy.the whole starbucks thoought we were crazy. haha.now, we are officially the RAINMATS.
I went off at
12:35 AM
